Will There be Cake?

I have Lyme. I’d like to not have it anymore. I also just want cake.

About Me

 

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I really don’t know how to talk about myself. For example, that torturous game we were all forced to play the first day of elementary school where we all went around the room and had to introduce ourselves and say something interesting made me sick to my stomach. It lasted until college. Like, really? I’m 20 years old. We are still playing this game? No one is even looking at me. Anyways. My name is Tara and I like being outdoorsie, reading, shopping, writing, and art, if you were wondering. I also really like cake – enough to put it my blog title. So… that’s like, a lot. But to be serious, all of these entries are the literary products of my life. Which is strange, given that for now I am leaving this public. I keep staring at the privacy settings but I keep doing nothing about it. But more about me. I was born, raised, and still am, a member of the LDS church. I am a Mormon. I am Christian. This defines me the most.

As for the rest of the stuff, I was born in Michigan as the first of five children to my two wonderful parents. Childhood is mostly a blur of obsessing over animals, pretending to be animals, and begging my parents to buy me animals. In the second grade my mother pulled me and my brother out of school and began to home-school us. Since those years, I have endured all the typical home-school jokes… even still as an adult. And because I appreciate humor, I encourage them. A lot of them are true, I was weird for a while. However, the real truth about those years is that they were filled with far more education than public school ever offered me. My mother provided us with the opportunity to learn anything we ever wanted to. Also, while I was home-schooled I often took my books and read them in the chicken coop. I’ll allow you all to have one shot at that.

Fast forward to present day. I live in Salt Lake City on a hill with “D”, my amazing husband, who is awesome. I also parent a dog with which I foster an unnatural attachment to. Three and a half months after I married, my health nose-dived overnight and I became seriously ill. I’ve since been diagnosed with a long-standing Lyme Disease infection, chronic Lyme, or Neuroborreliosis. The disease has since traveled to my brain and nervous system and has required aggressive, invasive, and long-term treatment.

Unfortunately, due to Lyme Disease having become a political issue, so little is researched on this chronic stage of the disease. I, with many others, are the guinea pigs in this generation as a few good doctors try to treat ahead of the research. This blog will feature a lot of the difficulties involved with my treatment, but also a lot of my victories – physical, emotional, and spiritual. I feel strongly that despite my challenges and sufferings (which are no different than many others) I need to spread hope and share the light that can be found amidst a horrible disease that frequently steals both. Since becoming sick I have also developed a strong desire to educate the public about the dangers, difficulties, and controversies surrounding this disease which is infecting us at astonishing rates, year after year.

But back to cake. Lyme has taken many things from me. I can’t have cake during my Lyme treatment. I haven’t had cake since early 2013. I love cake. If I can’t have cake at the end of this, then what is the point. Sometimes, I think cake is all that matters.

I enjoy a little sarcasm too. I’ll sit down now.

26 comments on “About Me

  1. Julie Cox
    February 8, 2017

    Sometimes I eat cake anyway (like over the sink after the kids go to bed on their birthdays) and then I suffer. Thanks for your humor! I’ll share my story soon.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Jennifer Campbell
    October 4, 2016

    Hi Tara, a friend of mine from SIMC in Reno shared a link with me to one of your Youtube videos, thank you for sharing such a vulnerable time of what life has been like. I just started IV antibiotics, getting my PICC tomorrow. I was at SIMC this time last year…..a lot has changed in that year.
    I’m really curious about about autoimmune markers and whether you and/or others have tested positive for multiple other “diseases”.
    I’d love to hear about your time in Reno and how that went for you.
    Glad to see your progress! Sending prayers for strength and healing……and good vibes =)

    Jen

    Like

    • tarathackeray
      October 4, 2016

      Hi Jen, thank you first of all! I only spent two weeks in Reno supporting a friend who was receiving treatment there at the time. Ive stuck with my LLMD in DC since the beginning. Sounds like we may have just missed each other at SIMC though! I haven’t tested positive for autoimmune markers, but we never really delved in to that deeply after basic tests were normal. Most of my illness has been neurological/psych without too much pain (at least life interrupting pain like most experience so I never saw a Rheumatologist or anything. However I do know others who have had autoimmune markers but continue to make Lyme treatment a priority believing there is a cause and effect there. Good luck with your IV abx and wish you the best! Feel free to message me anytime through my contact me tab 🙂

      Like

  3. Eino Taruk
    April 2, 2016

    I had undiagnosed Lyme 5 years, include AV block at beginning, acute ehalt failure symptoms, and late joint and eye complications. I had blood test, borrelia was detected and i had doxy. Most issues are solved now.

    Like

  4. Eino Taruk
    April 2, 2016

    did you had positive diagnosis by blood sample or tissue test, or diagnosis is based on symptoms?

    Like

    • tarathackeray
      April 2, 2016

      Diagnosed by symptoms, negative testing on other similar conditions, and some antibody activity on a western blot.

      Like

  5. Anonymous
    March 17, 2016

    Tara, I just stumbled across some of your you tube videos… You are so incredibly brave administering treatment on your own. You are extremely inspiring & I thank you for putting your story out there. I am still at the beginning of this journey and so much of the information I read and videos I watch are terrifying & while I see the pain & heartache you endure, I’m left feeling some hope of getting through this.. A lot of the other stuff I read makes me feel like I am not going to make it. So thank you for giving me a little hope. I wish you health. I hope you are kicking butt..!

    Liked by 1 person

    • tarathackeray
      March 17, 2016

      Thank you… You have every reason to hope! Yes, the beginning and even during treatment it is scary, but you can do this! Wellness usually comes far later than you anticipate, so don’t give up. Message me anytime!

      Like

  6. I know what you mean about not being able to eat cake! I have Lyme and Babesia as well. I’m curious, did you ever do chelating (EDTA) IVs? Another question: did you have a lot of emotional stuff come up as well as physical stuff before meds and once starting them?

    Like

    • tarathackeray
      March 8, 2016

      No on the EDTA chelating, maybe I will try it after my treatment for Lyme is over (progressing just fine without it for now). And yes, I did experience a myriad of psychiatric symptoms too. Hope you are doing well! Many blessings 🙂

      Like

  7. Bill Duoos
    January 9, 2016

    Hi Tarai I read your story obout why you chose abxs for treatment along with your above story, I cant beleave how much we have in comon, I know we are in the beginning stages in society to just begin to understand this disease. I to went on abx treatment ,ive been treating for just over 7 years and about half way 3 to 4 years into treatment I was put on a biofilm buster along with my abx, my immune system soon acknowledge it had a disease at hand as the biofilm was being broke up. My C4A levels jumped from normal to very high. Its stayed high for awhile and started a slow decline with a few small jumps. It has been 3 to 4 years now since my c4a soared, my last LLMD apointment jan 6 16 my doc told me my C4A level is now back to normal. We lowered meds abit because of me feeling much much better, but will be monitored for some time , he also told me my CD57 is climbed up to normal. I want to share this with you because my experience with the biofilm factor and how the microbes can hide so well under years of abxs and can then be exposed and destroyed . I also want to share with you I too had this as a child undiagnosed. I also was a part of the case studies that helped pass the MINNESOTA STATE LYME BILL last year. Im much older then you 57 years young and I beleave abxs were my only hope to have at least the last part of my life well.I want to say good luck on your treatment and god bless Bill

    Liked by 1 person

    • Bill Duoos
      January 9, 2016

      Im so sorry, I after reading outher coments I realized I im not in right spot , I put my coment in ( why you choose abxs) sorry to waste your space you can remove if you want. I realy hope you do get to the point where you can eat your cake, im still catching on

      Liked by 1 person

  8. Gary Arthur
    November 12, 2015

    Tara: Thank you for sharing your thoughts and not giving up hope. My daughter has Lyme disease, as well, and suffers along with everyone else. May all the Lyme sufferers eat cake one day soon.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. LymieLovesJesus
    August 7, 2015

    So grateful to have found your page! Off to read and soak in all your words!! Sponge cake?

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Marilyn Kent Todd Jones
    August 2, 2015

    I loved reading about you. I am not surprised you love writing. I love your style and your sarcasm. I, too, hope you eat cake soon. May we all have miracles.

    Liked by 1 person

    • tarathackeray
      August 3, 2015

      Thank you 🙂

      Like

  11. Lara
    July 14, 2015

    I also have chronic Lyme, and enjoyed your hopeful post!

    Liked by 1 person

    • tarathackeray
      July 14, 2015

      Thank you! I wish you the best in your journey to health 🙂

      Like

  12. Marianne Rodgers
    April 7, 2015

    Lyme is a thief!!! I drink my cake. Oops! I mean I drink a lot of chocolate; goat milk, yogurt or kefir, rice protein, cinnamon, nutmeg, just a tad of almond flavoring, herbs, and STEVIA. Liquid cake. I really do think chocolate is a hormone. With IBS problems, the chocolate, for some reason, seems to settle things for a while. When taking IV ABX, I could eat anything. We all are different. I will repeat, you are way to young to be so sick. So sorry! Maybe you will be well when you are old. God bless!!!

    Liked by 1 person

    • tarathackeray
      April 8, 2015

      I will keep that liquid cake recipe for when I’m allowed chocolate again! Thank you Marianne, may you be well as well can be, also.

      Like

  13. paulinah3
    February 7, 2015

    I’ll only tell this to trusted people, at Christmas time, I spent a couple nights looking up places that sell choclate covered grahma crackers and choclate covered pretzels. I put all kinds of treats in imaginary carts and pretended I was going to order them for other people ( that never goes well!). My mouth started watering and I finally caught myself doing it and was like, ‘what is wrong with you, do you like abuse’ ! Then I just laughed at myself. Crazy what this thing does to people. Right now I’m trying to do a juice fast (ala “Fat Sick and Nearly Dead”). But it’s creating herxing so I’m not sure how to do it . I have a lot of trouble with klindomycin. You are on a ton of it. Im trying to work up to your dosage, in pill form, but I can only get to 6 capsules a day at 300mgs each. I can only to 4. It’s tough. But you have it a lot tougher with that picc line. I’ll keep you in my prayers.

    Liked by 1 person

  14. paulinah3
    February 6, 2015

    I’m actually excited that I get to have a piece of cake at my wedding in August. Otherwise I would have no cake in site to look forward to since I’m fighting Lyme disease as well. Sometimes I waste time by looking at deserts on Pinterest for no good reason ! These things we find exciting while trying to recover from this wretched illness. Pathetic, but you need to find ways to laugh at it. Which I totally love your sense of humor.
    Be well young Lady ! 😉

    Liked by 1 person

    • tarathackeray
      February 6, 2015

      Don’t even! I thought I was the idiot that does Pinterest searches just for the cake and pancakes pictures… 🙂

      Like

  15. marcy westerling
    January 17, 2015

    May you soon get to enjoy much cake!
    Marcy Westerling
    http://livinglydying.com/

    Like

    • tarathackeray
      January 17, 2015

      Thank you! Can’t wait!

      Like

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Just a little throwback of us four-ish years ago ❤️ #dctemple #dc #ldstemple I scoured my pictures looking for one of my dad today, and every one was either of him performing some sort of service for one of us kids, or looking at rocks and plants (so my dad). I found this one and it just touched my heart. Not only do I reflect on how much my dad means to me this time of year, but I also reflect on my brother who passed on just days before Father's Day in 2009. This picture is of the two of them - dad has helped all of us kids over the "rocks" in our lives, but this picture especially melts me. 
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